love & lesbos ☻♡
im a bad person who thinks bad thoughts like ‘ew what is that girl wearing’ and then remember that im supposed to be positive about all things and then think ‘no she can wear what she wants, fuck what other people say damn girl u look fabulous’ and im just a teeny bit hypocritical tbh
I was always taught by my mother, That the first thought that goes through your mind is what you have been conditioned to think. What you think next defines who you are.
My roommate and I are really sick and we look like shit, but we were hungry so we ordered pizza.
But we didn’t want anyone to see us, so we asked them over the phone if we can leave the money on the door and they can just drop off the pizza.
The guy said sure.
So we decided to leave a nice little note
and we hung it above the door bell. I hope they like it!
pizza spelt its own name wrong
Calvin and Hobbes: the college years
Y’know, I scrolled past this and thought to myself, “yeah, this is pretty cute, but I’m not gonna reblog it.”
Until I saw that last gif.
"Can I kiss you?" is probably the cutest thing you can ever hear someone ask.
the single most accurate description of this movie i have seen
i don’t normally post porn sorry
I do, and this is much better.
I finished this in my head with “…can prevent forest fires”
I made an old lady blush today at work because she ordered two senior coffees and I said “SENIOR ? I’m sorry miss, i’m going to have to ask to see some ID.” and she covered her mouth and went “Oh dear me” and couldn’t stop smiling
Sometimes i forget scallops swim like this its hilarious
I THOUGHT THAT ONLY HAPPENED ON SPONGEBOB
J U N I O R
I often forget that the creator of Spongebob was actually a marine biologist at one point.
everyone yelled at me for not wearing a bra tonight sorry
have you ever used the RC dragoon beyblade? dude they’re so damn cheap like they stop spinning pretty fast but not before they wreck everyone’s beyblades
are you hitting on me
thought you were a beyblade hero
nigga, you used a RC beyblade???
Nigga you weak.
I used a reg plastic dranzer man I got wrecked by RC dragoon namsayin
I’m not wearin a bra
Yeah, yeah, that’s cool and all.
But this nigga used a Dranzer.
A fucking Dranzer.
That’s more important than you not wearing a bra right now.
The day thirst trap didn’t work. And she made sure they knew it was thirst trap.
… and it still didn’t work.